Teen Pregnancy - your views?

[AWD Chaser]

I am appalled. I just came across this website:

http://www.teenpregnancy.org/

Now, don't get me wrong, I think YOUNG girls getting pregnant may not be the best idea in the world, but I am outraged at the slogan:

Preventing Teen Pregnancy


Me and my partner are both 19 (going on 20) and we are expecting very soon and looking forward to it too. We are both in good jobs, live by ourselves in our own house, and have been doing so for quite some time.

Now tell me, why should someone PREVENT my partner from getting pregnant. I am so p***ed off at some orgs making over-generalised comments etc... just like how females should not get boob jobs till they are well over 20.... that sort of stuff varies from person to person.

Fair enough there are pro's and cons about having a baby at a young age, but I will never regret it, therefore, who's to say teen pregnancy is a bad thing for ALL teens?



What’s your opinion?

[hsv8]

Well being a granfather at 44 sucks and not for my sake but my daughter has taken a path that will basically be her lot now as the responsibility of a child will allow a lot of lifes opportunities to pass you. It's not so bad now but when your 40 and still in the same place as you are when you were when 18 just thinking of all the what if's? and I could have done thats then you might re think if only I had grown up and got my together first. either way it's a free country and every one has choices to make as to where they want to be in the food chain

[Outbackjack]

Originally Posted by au3 chaser

Fair enough there are pro's and cons about having a baby at a young age, but I will never regret it, therefore, who's to say teen pregnancy is a bad thing for ALL teens?



What’s your opinion?

There is your answer, dont sweat it, stand by your family and the rest of the world can go get stuffed. You obviously dont expect others to support you, good on you. I hope all goes well with the new little tacker.

[AWD Chaser]

Thanks.

I think what I should have really said in the first place is, because there is actually an organisation out there that feels so strong about this that they call it a problem, I wanted to hear some opinions from someone older then me, and maybe who was once in the same boat.

I have made my decission and stand by it... just the fact they call it a problem really peeves me off...

[Poetic Justice]

I don't really think it's supposed to say ALL teens shouldn't do it. I think it'd be more about the 15-17 year olds who are just being silly..

[Outbackjack]

19 going on 20 is not too young in my opinion. In fact you are probably going to be better at dealing with all those sleepless nights than us old farts. My last little one was born when I was 42. That could be argued is the other end of the equasion.

[AWD Chaser]

lol - sleepless nights - For the next 2 weeks I'm doing 8pm - 8am straight.... at least my boss will let me bring bub to work with me on nights.... that'll be good for the mrs...

[LTDHO]

I think it aims more at 14 to 17 than 18 to 19.
There are alot of girls giving birth before they are 18! Sometime without the father and without $$$$

[Outbackjack]

Originally Posted by au3 chaser

lol - sleepless nights - For the next 2 weeks I'm doing 8pm - 8am straight.... at least my boss will let me bring bub to work with me on nights.... that'll be good for the mrs...

Thats alot of straight nights.... Its damned good of your boss to let you take junior to work.

[hsv8]

either way life is what you make it the choices are yours and should be respected by those who you call friends - a great way to find out who they are

It's neither wrong nor right and no one can or should determine that or state it however they can have an opinion but no one should be juged by it

[Falcon_Phill]

Ify ou can afford to look after it, go for it.

[ltd]

Yeah, I think it aims at the younger teens like the 13-18 group. Whilst there are some noble guys out there at that age, there are alot of guys who panic and leave the girl holding the baby. At a young age ie 16, a pregnant girl or new mother still has yet to experience alot of things in life, and often becomes jealous of her friends. My mates sister had a child at 17, and it was all too much for her. The boyfriend left her as it was too much responsibility and he wanted to just hang out with his mates, she would farm the kid out to anyone who would mind him just so as to have time out with the girlfriends. Eventually she moved up to the central coast living on welfare, suffered severe depression until when she reached the ripe old age of 20 when she dropped the kid of at the grandparents, and took a whole bunch of sleeping pills.

As scientists say the adult brain hasn't fully developed until the age of 25 (Scientific studies have proven this), and for those of you who are older imagine having a child that young. I remember when I was 18 and all I can say is thank heavens I never had a child, as this was the period I was learning to fly costing tens of thousands a year. I would never have become a pilot if I were to have a child at that age, and I especially wouldn't have been financially and mentally prepared for it.

AU3 Chaser you do seem to be the exception to the rule; as you have already decided to do the hard yards by doing the right thing. I wouldn't take offence because primarily it is not aimed at you. It is more for the single, younger mothers who become a drain on the public purse through welfare, medicare, dept housing, etc and eventually become breeders to support an addiction. Bogans basically.

[NAK302]

number 3 for me. if the baby is planned and you both have the maturity and be in a financial position to support your offspring then go for it. i object when the young expect everyone around them (including tax payers) to support their little mishap.

[Walkinshaw]

Originally Posted by GT-0733

number 3 for me. if the baby is planned and you both have the maturity and be in a financial position to support your offspring then go for it. i object when the young expect everyone around them (including tax payers) to support their little mishap.

Bingo.

Genralistic calls such as "no person under 20 should have kids" shouldn't even be entertained. Don't get angry with it, just ignore it. Simple.

The target for the campaign is clearly NOT people like our thread starter here, rather the "lets go have a fun time....oh crap, im preggers" people

[Yummy Mummy]

I think it depends on the individual. I had a friend who was pregnant when we were 14. The community outcry and ridicule toward her was amazing, and to tell you the truth, as much as myself and my friends supported her, we had our prejudices although we didn't make them known. To her credit, she gave birth to, and raised a beautiful boy, in addition to going on to have another two children at age 17 and 19 respectively. She married the man who fathered all three children, bought her own home at age 18, and has become what I would say a more balanced and better mother than even myself, who had a child at 25.

I have an issue with young girls falling pregnant and relying on government benefits to get them through life, but if they take responsibility for their actions and continue to forge fantastic lives for themselves and their children, then more power to them.

[XRchic]

I had my first at age 22, and I had my last 3 weeks ago at age 34. I have to say that pregnancy and childbirth are much easier if you are younger! I am lucky with my newborn though, he sleeps really well and is doing really well, so no real stress at the moment.

Mentally, I think I was ready at 22, but that was vastly different to 18 (or less). At 18 I know I would not have been able to be a good parent or financially support the child. I was a child myself. Between 18 and 22 a lot of things changed in my life, forcing me to grow up. I think some people are fine to have a child at age 18 or 19, such as au3 chaser above, but I know I was not ready.

I think the issues here are more about very young Mums, say 15 or so. I dont agree with such young girls becoming parents, as it is not good for the girl physically to have a child that young (while she is still growing), it is not good mentally (while she is still growing up herself) and while she is unlikely to be able to financially support her child. There are also extremes - my cousin's daughter was 12 years old and a drug addict when she got pregnant to her much older "partner" and the baby was born drug addicted, very premature and very sick. This is the sort of teen pregnancy I am against. But the girl's mother, my cousin, had her when she was 15, and her mother (my aunt) had her when she was 16.... there is a cycle there I think. They ALL rely on welfare and always have, and that is their mentality, and I disagree with that also.

au3 chaser, congratulations mate, I hope things go well for you and your partner. I am quite sure that you guys are not who that was aimed at and that you guys will be fantastic parents and enjoy the experience.

Jac

[gozza]

as the long as the parents have the baby for the right reasons...and the child has to be loved uncondiotnally and supported....if this is the case then it shouldn't matter when you have a child

[Lukeyson]

if it wasnt for teen pregnancy i wouldnt be alive, mums had me 2 weeks after her 17th. She was a responsible mum who always put me first. I think thats what it comes down to, alot of teens have unwanted kids and they get neglected, but if its for the right reasons as gozza said, anything can work !

[ltd]

Originally Posted by XR8fella

if it wasnt for teen pregnancy i wouldnt be alive, mums had me 2 weeks after her 17th. She was a responsible mum who always put me first. I think thats what it comes down to, alot of teens have unwanted kids and they get neglected, but if its for the right reasons as gozza said, anything can work !

Times have changed though. When an unwed girl had a baby years ago she was often castigated by many and this only served to make her more determined. Invariably a large number of young or single mothers succeeded in raising responsible and balanced kids whereas these days, there are so many more options and excuses for single mothers, and there is also a mass of government agencies that didn't exist years ago all aimed at making the experience easier. This has unfortunately led to a demise in the overall sense of responsibility one feels about her child.

Of course they can speak in platitudes aboud the extra responsibility they carry as a single mum, but seldom few actually raise the calibre of child that we witnessed in this country over the recent years. It is too easy for too many now just to give up their child and go out and party. I knew a girl who did this, and she ended up having 7 kids to 8 different blokes. Why 8, well she couldn't remember who she was with at the time. She is a welfare wowser who cheered when costello announced the baby bonus. After she had 4 myself and some mates used to make jokes about having to rebore her with a leg of lamb and pulling out the bone; but now after 7 we all just shake our heads in disbelief.

[Racecraft]

you dont mention how long you have been together?

That has a bearing on the commitment you have to each other and inturn to a child..

Afew of my friends had early babies, they have aged beyond words, for good or bad is a personal opinion.

[Yum-Yum]

Well my Ex was 17 when she fell pregnant I was 19, it was definitley a suprise to us both, but we perservered the best we could and it helped to have the support of both our families on the path we took, we struggled along the way and made the best way in life we could from this decision, now our child is turning 13 this year and making leaps and bounds academically, I'm more proud of her than she will ever know (being a young woman she apparently knows everything lol) we had 2 more children later on, unfortunately our relationship wasn't as strong as our will to become the best parents we could be. If my daughter were to come home and say she was pregnant, her mother and I would again make the best from the situation and support her as our families supported us. Congrats au3 chaser on the coming of your newborn. All the best for the future mate.

"If there's grass on the pitch, lets play"

/ali g quote

[Aeron]

Originally Posted by BlackLS

"If there's grass on the pitch, lets play"

/ali g quote

Hahahahahahahaha!! : : :

Look, i think in your situation its not a problem. You both have good jobs and sound like good people. But the "Preventing Teen Pregnancy" slogan doesn’t apply to your situation. It applies to teens that don’t have jobs, and maybe aren't in a stable relationship and have the potential to become yet another single mum rasing a child by her self. And thats not your situation. I don’t think its aimed at you and your g/f.

[4.9 EF Futura]

Not really an option to suit my view there.... wether a woman wants a baby or if it just happens - she should have the right to choose. Choose to get pregnant or if it happens otherwise... choose to bring a child into the world or otherwise...

A mistake is a shocking term to use. That child is going to grow up - do you really want to tell him/her that they're a mistake? Suprise, unexpected, unplanned, whatever - just dont call someone's life a mistake.

[brenx]

Let them go. Let them live and learn. Some people need to learn that way. My sister managed to get pregnant to a bloke who she had an on/off relationship for a few years. He wanted nothing to do with her. She chased and chased etc. She eventually snagged him but 3 years later they still aren't engaged or married. All the better for her. I think she wanted him for two reasons a) his six figure salary and b) for my nephew to have a fulltime father on hand. My sister doesn't work anymore. She gave up a all expenses paid job to stay at home and be a mum. I reckon she's nuts but I guess the calling was there.

I've seen/met some real warped kids due to single parent up brings but in my field we only see worst case scenarios :( I rehabilitated one over a 2 year period. That one is doing very well now which I'm happy about.

[XRchic]

You dont have to be a teenage Mum to be a single parent, and not all single parents are young and irresponsible, and not all children growing up with a single parent are/grow up warped.

I was the single parent of two kids until last year when I found my current partner. My kids went through hard times, when their father left, but it was nothing to do with my age or sense of responsibility. They are now happy kids, both very intelligent and doing well at school, loads of friends, they are well travelled and have seen a lot, and while I may have been a single parent to them for 8 years, I also earned in the top tax bracket and provided them with a good life.

They also had a lot of other family, including their grandparents who were and are great to them. They had plenty going for them despite not having a Dad - they were better off without a Dad than having a bad one, and this may be common for many single parents, regardless of the age of the parents.

Plenty of non single parents bring up warped kids. Plenty of older parents bring up warped kids too.

Just my opinion.

[Aeron]

Originally Posted by XRchic

You dont have to be a teenage Mum to be a single parent, and not all single parents are young and irresponsible, and not all children growing up with a single parent are/grow up warped.

No no no, sorry, that’s now what I meant. Im not having a go at single parents at all. What im talking about is what I've seen it in some suburbs of Sydney (and I guess its all over Aus), these 16 and 17-year-old girls with no support from the father, no job and doing it tough. Most of the pregnancies are unplanned, and that makes it hard.

[XRchic]

Originally Posted by Aeron

No no no, sorry, that’s now what I meant. Im not having a go at single parents at all. What im talking about is what I've seen it in some suburbs of Sydney (and I guess its all over Aus), these 16 and 17-year-old girls with no support from the father, no job and doing it tough. Most of the pregnancies are unplanned, and that makes it hard.

Sorry Aeron, I was NOT referring to your post, its cool mate and I certainly was not having a go at anyone in any other post, Im sorry if it came across that way! I was just saying my opinion based on my own experiences, as are others.

For the record though, the single parent stereotype comes from somewhere and there are unfortunately too many bad ones to give the rest of us a bad name.

[Shonky]

Not being a parent (well... that I know of anyway :P) Id say...

WGAF.

If the child is born into a supportive family and taken care of correctly, what does it matter how old the folks are?

There are plenty of crap parents out there... old and young.

[FPV8U]

There are alot of girls giving birth before they are 18! Sometime without the father and without $$$$

I have seen both sides of teen pregnancy with my mother being 16 when she had my older brother and having me just before she was 20, without being bias and seeing what she has achived for herself and her achivements with myself and my older brother, she has done a fantatic making sure we have never missed out whether it mean working 1,2 and up to 3 jobs at one time (Single Parent).

On the flip side i have a good mate who got his Ex-Girl friend preganant at the age of 16, it started off fine, then they broke up and it was all going well, but that soon came to an end, my friend no longer see's his daughter which really gets him down, but for fear of his safety (He was beaten and threatened with a weapon last time he was invited around for a 'Talk')

This to me shows how it is just another issue when the outcome relies 100% on the person's involved there to me is not general trend with this sort of a subject, No i don't think that girls (And Guys) my age (17) should have Little ones, but in no way am i saying that all girls less than the age of 18 or 20 or whaterever are bad mothers.