[Bad Bird]

I lost my favourite aunt to that abominable disease this year.

I'm going to have to disagree with the conspiracy theorists on this one. As a scientist, I know of some excellent groups working on the problem of cancer, particularly early cancer detection. A particular group on Germany has found that cancer cells, irrespective of what they are have a distinctly lower Young's Modulus than any healthy cells. A mouth swab and stress-strain testing of the cells has already lead to a 90+% detection rate in clinical trials.